Borris, Natasha, and Culture Shock in Phuket, Thailand:

A Slightly Insensitive Stream of Brad’s Consciousness, Part II.

Let’s be honest with you: None of us was ready to leave Bangkok, even if it meant sunning ourself on the sandy beaches of Phuket for a week. We fell in love with the Capitol of Thailand…of street food, Singha beer, manners, smiles, and friendliness. But, the beach beckoned and we answered. Bangkok wore us out…but we’re all ready to go back. We had so many wonderful experiences during our short visit. 

Cooking Class

Strategically, Phuket now (in the spectrum and order of Bangkok – Phuket – Singapore) was the right move. Bangkok was one of the best experiences of my life, but it was exhausting.  It was work for us….research, trekking, and exhaustive consumption. This is a break we need. 

Our Awesome Food Tour Guide, Olive

Now, to Phuket. Our flight south was…well, frustrating. We were surrounded by people that induce cringing, mouth breathing, and repetitive hand washing. It resembled Air Tran service into Myrtle Beach. And that’s where we arrived: the Myrtle Beach of South East Asia…PARTY!   And John Stamos was on our flight!

Bad Picture, But It's Him!

He must have been in a private cabin on the flight. The rest of us were in a….full house. Womp Womp.

Eastern European Invasion
They speak two languages in Phuket. Australian (not complaining), and Russian. If you’re Russian and like the beach, you come here. And in the same fashion that the South Carolina strip propagates certain visages of American culture that are less-than-desirable to most, the Russian population is done no favors by its members vacationing in Phuket. Dress codes, directions, and general decorum simply don’t seem to apply. But, hey, if 400 pound men in speedos and gold chains is your thing, I’m not judging. Actually, kinda sorta judging.  Now, the Australians make up for most of this. And they rock it out. I mean…wow! Lets just say that if I get arrested for poaching, you’ll know it wasn’t local fauna. Moving on.

Phuket is stunningly beautiful. The Bradleys tell me it resembles the Virgin Islands. So far, we’ve enjoyed elephant rides, scuba diving, fruity cocktails, shrimp the size of footballs, Japanese heavy metal, and lots of quality people-watching.  Food remains delicious and engaging…although we may have snuck a hamburger into the mix when we arrived. Noodles and basil only get you so far for so long.  Someone needed a Freedom Fry.

Scapegoats
In Thailand, nothing is your fault unless you insult the monarchy.

The Three Bradleys pay tribute to his Royal Highness King Rama IX and offer thanks for a wonderful stay in Thailand!

Everything else is absorbed and transferred to a designated scapegoat. For instance, I knocked a cocktail off the table in a bar. It exploded. I apologized; my server was punished. I was late to a museum tour and forgot to put my camera away. I apologized; my tour guide was punished.  I love this country.  A smile gets me everywhere; nothing is my fault. Somehow, I expect this to get me into trouble when I return.

Oh, sorry!  You’re still paying attention.  I’m typing this on the beach and got distracted by one of Oz’s finest. Mmmm. Wish you could see this. Ok back to the blog…

Over the next few days, we’ll catch you up on the rest of our Phuket adventures and outings. The autocratic citystate of Singapore is treating us very well thus far, but we’ll get to that in a few days.  For now, know that it’s a clean, safe melting pot of cool cultures and their delicious culinary styles.

Making Friends in Phuket

Until next time, das svedaniya, and  g’day mates!

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